Truth, Lies and In Between

I just like to poke fun at the other branches in the Army. I always liked this one.

There’s a saying in the Army: “There are two branches in the Army, Infantry and support, which one are you?”

In the beginning,

God created the heavens and the earth, and the INFANTRY
And God saw the INFANTRY, and that it was good, and he was pleased.

And God spake unto the INFANTRY: “Be tactical, and proficient, and rule the earth and subdue it. And have dominion over the fish in the sea, and over the birds in the heavens, and over all the key terrain.”
And the INFANTRY dwelt in the land therein.

And it came to pass that many missions were upon the INFANTRY, and they called upon their God: “Oh Lord help us, for we are weary.”
And the Lord heard their grunts and took mercy upon them, for lo, key terrain was abundant throughout the land.

And he raised up the weakest of the INFANTRY and set them on obsolete beasts of burden, and these he called CAVALRY. And the CAVALRY begat the ARMOR. And the Lord saw the ARMOR, that it was mediocre, and laughed, saying “Well, thou canst not win them all. Let them lead in case of land mines.”

And the INFANTRY and ARMOR dwelt in the land therein. But it came to pass that the INFANTRY again cried out: “Lord help us, for we are weary.”

And the Lord heard their voices and looked with favor upon them, for they were blessed.

Then God took those of the Armour with butts like base-plates and breath like sulfur and tiny, tiny pee-pees and these He made Artillery. But God saw that the Artillery, too, was mediocre and said unto Himself, “Oh well, garbage in; garbage out.”
And the Lord said unto the INFANTRY: “When it is dark, the ARTILLERY shall light your way, and when thou needest HE, WP, H & I and counter-battery fire, all this ye shall have.”

And the Lord gave the ARTILLERY big guns and said you will add dignity to what would otherwise be a vulgar brawl. And the Lord also said unto the ARTILLERY and ARMOR “Try not to hurt thyselves.”
Though the Lord cautioned the Infantry to never, never, never trust Tac-fire or any other electronic computer in the hands of the Artillery.

And the Infantry, the Armor, and the Artillery dwelt in the land therein. Then the Artillery created the Air Defense Artillery; but quickly asked forgiveness.

And the INFANTRY and the ARMOR and the ARTILLERY dwelt in the land therein. But it came to pass that the INFANTRY again called upon their God: “Lord, help us, for we are weary.”

And the Lord heard their voices so he touched those of the ARMOR and ARTILLERY who were miserly and called these FINANCE CORPS; and those who could not communicate and called these SIGNAL CORPS; and those with no friends and called these MILITARY POLICE; and those who were filled with greed and called these QUARTERMASTER; and those who played with controlled substances and called these MEDICAL CORPS; and those who hid in darkness and called these INTELLIGENCE CORPS; and those who were eternally lost and called these TRANSPORTATION CORPS; and those who played in the dirt and called these ENGINEERS; and those who had no skills at all and called these ORDNANCE.

And the Lord saw all these that he had touched, and knew that they were indeed touched. And the INFANTRY and the others dwelt in the land therein.

And it came to pass that the INFANTRY again cried out: “Lord, help us, for we are weary.”
And the Lord looked upon the INFANTRY with anger and the heavens roared with thunder and the skies burned with fire, and God spoke: “How couldst thou yet be weary? I have given unto thee ARMOR and a host of others to provide support to thee.”

Humbly the Infantry abased themselves again before their God, crying, “Lord, it is of these that we are weary!”

And the Lord looked upon the INFANTRY and smiled, and forgave them, for he understood that of which they spoke.

THEY WERE INFANTRY, BY GOD!
THANK GOD FOR THE INFANTRY